Not everybody is going to like you, and you know that? I accept that. We live in a world where there are so many people living to please others. So many people go out of their way to make others happy. We often forget that actually our purpose is not to serve others or be liked by others. If you’re a person who follows a faith or a God then you know that you have a purpose set before you by your creator. We all have a purpose and one of them is not to make sure that other people like us.
I’m sure we can all relate to the High school tale of a school bully who picks on you for no reason. Or the one colleague at work who has an issue with you because you got promoted and they didn’t. As I have grown into an adult, I slowly started to realise the reality. Not everybody is going to like you. And quite frankly I don’t want everyone to like me. Alot of the time we seek approval from others, and thats where our confidence tends to lie. Which we all know isn’t where it should come from.
THEIR ISSUE IS THEIR ISSUE
As I have gotten older I have slowly started to realise that a lot of the time when people don’t like you, it says more about them than you. People often project their feelings about themselves onto other people. If someone is unhappy in their own appearance, they tend to pick on others for the way they look. Its really crazy how the brain works, because a lot of the time people do this without realising.
It’s not the best feeling to find out someone doesn’t like you, but its not up to you to figure it out either. You can begin to feel guilty or worried, thinking about why they might not like you and what you did. Let it go. Holding onto it does you no good in the long run.
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IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU
In life it’s not your job to make people like you. Often times their issue is their issue. You were not put on this earth to make people like you. The people in your life, like you for you. You should never change for others. This is something that can take a really long time to realise and its something I have battled with in the past.
Realising this though, brings so much freedom to life. It stops the questioning of yourself, or the feeling of needing to change. Once you fully become comfortable in who you are, you no longer seem to care about the opinions of others. It’s really a freeing feeling.
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There is certainty that in life, people wont like you just because you are you. But that doesn’t mean you should change the way you act or how you are. Continue being yourself. Your tribe and the people who are meant to be in your life will naturally gravitate towards you. It wont need to be forced. Friendships and relationships that are meant for you will be easy. It won’t take guess work and trying to figure out if people like you or not. You will know.
So, be who you are and who you were created to be. Don’t ever change for anyone.
Do you struggle to accept that not everyone will like you? How do you combat those feelings?
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Accept that is so complicated, I am working on it. Thanks for sharing 😊
Thanks for reading!
Lost At Thirty Something
This post is so true. I’ve always been a people pleaser and have always struggled if I find that somebody doesn’t like me.
Quite often this ends up with me bending over backwards to try and change their minds.
This is definitely linked with anxiety and self esteem issues and can be really damaging if not kept in check.
Always a good reminder that you can only control your own actions and if that doesn’t please everyone then tough luck.
Great post! I realized last year that I had been so busy trying to get people to like me, that I never once thought about whether I like them. Sometimes people don’t have a connection and that’s okay!
Yes, thats so true. Alot of the time we don’t even like them, so why are we trying?
Nice post, just like one author said, that in life, 30 percent of people will love you no matter what you do, 30 percent will hate you nomatter what you do, and no matter what you do you 30 per cent will ignore you. So you just have to continue on your good doing, to convince the percent that don’t sent you to love you.
Yup!! So true!
💜 Terrific Treatise as Ever EveryOne; really communicates very well one of the Many Reasons why I Don’t Like Being Around Other People Very Much 😂🤣😅😆😁😄😃😀🙂
Hahaha I feel that 🤣
I can’t stress enough on how true this is …I just figured I will do me for me ,whatever I think is good for ME I do it ,without a care in the world .
Such a great attitude to have 🙌🏼
Great post, accepting yourself…it’s a buzzword or cliché and when someone seeing the mirror the Jekyll and Mr Hyde Effect and no…
I’ve been with some of my classmates since 1st grade but I actually don’t know what issue they have with me. I mean they aren’t rude and talk to me nicely but still they don’t like me. I tried many times to understand why they do it and thought that it’s my problem but now when I think about it, I don’t think I did something wrong, and I’m very happy with my true friends😊
If you didn’t do anything wrong then it sounds like their issue. And even if you did, its up to them to communicate that to you. They should let you know what you did so you can put it right. Its unfair to keep someone guessing
Yeah! I know!
Straight up Facts!!!!!!
Trying to make everyone liking me is such a draining process!!!
For real! And an impossible process too!
“It’s not your job to make people like you” I feel this so much right now with a work colleague! Thank you for sharing! Great advice
I hope the situation you’re currently facing works out! I know it can be tough, especially when its to do with your job!
rebecca s revels
Here I am at sixty-three years of age, and I am still working on that, but, I feel that I have in the last year alone came a long way to realizing, accepting and actually wearing that as a crown of royalty of my own being.
I feel like its a constant thing were all learning, no matter what our age. It can be hard to figure it out!
We need to be reminded of this every damn day! haha
Lovely! I was always soaking myself in getting attention and trying to get loved and liked by people who didn’t really want me. Now I see what you mean.
I’ll reread it to sink in.
You are who you are, and people will love you for that. You don’t need to change or do anything different to be worthy of being liked!
As an HSP, it’s very much something I think about a lot. I try not to do things that will hurt another persons feelings and I’m hyper aware of my actions around others, subconsciously wondering if they are judging my every move. It’s something I’ve worked on as an adult and will continue to work on. I don’t care as much about other people’s opinions as I used to, but I’m still sensitive to how I’m viewed by those I love.
I think it takes a long time for a person to be completely comfortable in who they are. And it might not even be achievable for some. But taking the steps to help towards it is amazing and in the right direction.
Delicate and brutal
Great post Olivia! It is more important to love ourselves than to worry ourselves with trying to get everyone to like us.
Thanks so much! You’re right. We should love ourselves first!
What an eye opening post! I did realise that I had to face this fact very late in my life as it had caused me a lot of unhappiness in my younger days. I do not live to please anyone! But at the same time, it is important to remember that wanting people to like you is not exactly a bad trait – as it shows you will do good to other people 🙂
Its not a bad trait at all! But, we should never change or seek approval from external sources. We are who we are, and we should accept that and love who we are too.
Needed to hear this! I’ve spent so much time worrying about people that don’t like me instead of focusing on the ones that do. I have stopped seeking approval from those people and I’m so much happier.
I’ve learnt to accept that, and as much as it hurts every now and then, it does make life easier. We are all different and it’s not mandatory to like others. Respect is mandatory, liking isn’t.
Beautiful post 🥰 this is something I struggle with as well..
Darren Owen - Living PF
So much truth shared in this post. The older i get even the notion of trying to please people becomes exhausting. There’s more cons than pros and I’ve learnt that what peoples may think about me isn’t always my business or something I ought to be disturbed by. I’m not bothered about being liked all the time. But I’m working on not always trying to please people
As RuPaul would say it, “What other think of me is none of my business”.
Love it! And RuPaul 🙂
I really like this! Everyone should feel comfortable being themselves.
I do know some people who take this too far though..
i needed this, thank you !
Thanks for reading!
So glad you enjoyed it, thanks alot!
Loved this post, and i love being reminded of these things also. I think age teaches us this, and experience as well. No matter what you do- if someone has it in for you- they will find a flaw in everything you do. so love yourself and do what makes you happy!
Amazing writeup. People have told Me that I am a puppet. But yes! Amazing words..
I personally live by this. Sometimes you have to concede the fact that not everyone’s a fan. Yes, there are some things that are liked by a lot of people but nothing is universally liked.
Can’t please everyone, simple.
If everyone liked the same thing, the world would be boring.
I just had this discussion with my mom this week. She’s always been a people pleaser and still worries about what people think, she’s in her mid 80’s. She’s passed this thinking onto me but I’ve learned not to care anymore about what others think and concentrate on how I feel. This week, she was worried about upsetting a person by taking something back to the store because she felt pressured to buy it. It’s hard to overcome these feelings but I feel my load is lighter by shedding it.
Love this post. I have been learning that a lot more lately. Not everyone is going to like you and that is ok.
I have a very wise friend who says- “we’re not for everyone “. I think that’s ok! We aren’t and not everyone is for us. ( Being respectful and kind is still important)
Facts actually. I struggle with it also 🥲
A few years back I was so sensitive about people liking and not liking me. I displeased myself for others’ appreciation. Quite lately, after a lot of heartbreaks, I understood people whose application I counted was not worth it…I shouldn’t have cared what people think of me or not…if anything I care now I care about my happiness… It doesn’t matter if my action scratches down some of my so-called well wishes from my list of friends. I don’t need a whole lot of people to like me but a few genuine people who will like me for who I am.
Be true to yourself.. always. Do what makes you happy as long as you are not hurting other people. And you are not violating any law. 😊
i loved this post! i think that it is so sad that we live in a society where everyone is CONSTANTLY trying to impress others, or gain some sense of security in the illusion of being liked. thank you for posting this!!!
Thanks so much for reading! You’re right, its kind of exhausting isn’t it?!
Lisa V. Bryan
What a great piece! When I started my blog it really pushed me to accept I’d never please everyone and that it was time to just put me for me out there. It’s been a freeing experience that keeps me bloggin’! Loved this!
This is such a good post. I agree with all that you said. We shouldn’t care for other people’s opinions. I should think like this more often.
I use to struggle with those feelings of people not liking me and then I realized how much I loved myself and I stopped caring and it’s their lost 😊
Be who you are and who you were created to be. Be believe in yourself.