Something I have come to realise as I have gotten older is that more people than you think experience loneliness and feeling lonely. I know as I have gotten older, and my circle of friends got smaller, I have felt lonely from time to time too.
At the beginning of this year I completed a really big life goal for myself, I moved out. I’d never lived alone before, so wasn’t sure how I would feel. At first, it was tough. I felt lonely alot, but you get yourself into a routine and being alone really forces you to make the effort to see people and continue building those important relationships.
I’m a big Tik Tok user and I see so many videos on my home page of young people talking about not having friends in their twenties. They talk about how life outside of their immediate relationship or family can feel lonely, and how making friends is difficult. And I agree. Alot of the friendships we have now are from when we were younger. From school, or jobs. I know alot of my friendships are. Making friends in 2022 isn’t easy at all. We go out less, we interact face to face less too. It’s easy to pick up your phone and download a dating app, but there aren’t many options to create real friendships online.
WE ALL GO THROUGH PHASES OF FEELING LONELY
I really wanted to make this post for that one person who feels like they’re alone in feeling this way. I want to reassure you, that your feelings right now are valid and you’re not alone in feeling how you do. I’m sure there are hundreds, if not thousands of other people your age going through the same thing. It can feel awful. Feeling lonely can have you questioning everything in life. You wonder why you don’t have friends. You feel jealous because you see other people out enjoying life with their friends and you don’t have that.
For me, my feelings of loneliness comes and goes. It hasn’t happened for a while now. But, whenever I feel lonely I always do something to change that. I arrange plans with the friends I do have, or I go and see my parents. Sometimes you have to remember that the power is in your hands. Don’t just wait for someone to reach out to you, you reach out to them.
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HOW TO BUILD CONNECTIONS AS AN ADULT
The hardest part of living in our world in 2022, is how hard it is to make real in person connections with people. You aren’t at school anymore, you aren’t as confident as you were as a child either. So making friends doesn’t come as easy. Making new connections as an adult is something I think we all struggle to navigate. It takes some confidence and courage to build those new friendships because it’s not as easy as it was when you were younger.
Try talking to new people at work, or building your circle of friends online. Sometimes all we need is an ear to listen, and online friendships can be great for that. Another great tip is joining in person activity groups. Maybe you like running? Find a local running club and see if you can build some friendships there. This process might take some courage, and doing something out of your comfort zone. But it will all be worth it when you make yourself a new friend.
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