lifestyle

4 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others

by Olivia

We all do it, whether we realise it or not. We compare ourselves to others. “I wish I had her hair. I wish I had his abs. I wish I was that confident”. Well believe it or not, I bet somebody has said that about you too at some point. Self love isn’t something that just happens overnight. It can take some time to learn how to be confident in who you are. So I decided to create a list of things we can do as people instead of comparing ourselves to others.

1. Invest in Yourself

When we compare ourselves to others, we are focusing on somebody else’s life and not our own.That isn’t going to help us become better. Remember The grass is green where you water it. Remember who you are and how amazing you are, and if nobody has told you that today then here is your reminder from me.

You are amazing, your body woke you up this morning. You are going to accomplish great things today.

2. Take Time Away From Technology

I have found that lack of confidence can come from the constant scrolling through social media. Remember social media is just a highlight roll of everybody’s lives. People don’t show the bad and the ugly, only the exciting and perfectly photoshopped side. Take time away from technology. Be present in the now.

3. Be Grateful

You are alive, you are breathing, you are loved. Be grateful for your current circumstances (of course this is not applicable in all circumstances). You are where you are meant to be right now. Don’t look at what other people have and desire that, look around at what you have and be thankful for it. Even if they are small things like food, a home or a loving family. You are blessed more than you can imagine.

4. Get Inspired

Instead of wishing that you have what they have, let it inspire you. Let that be your goal and something for you to look to. It’s always great to have goals and want to accomplish more. Don’t let jealously get in the way of how great you could be too. Its not just achievable for others, its achievable for you too!

Do you struggle in comparing yourself to others? How do you overcome this? Are there any tips you can share with us?

Olivia x

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79 thoughts on “4 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others”

  3. Pingback: 4 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others – Writing with an Open Heart

  5. I totally agree with this, and I think that number 2 has to be given a highlight when it comes to self love. There is this thing, psychologically speaking, that people tend to base their happiness on reference points and we are bad at having the right reference points, in the case of number 2, people actually tend to base their happiness on other people’s lives, and that’s the thing about social media, it has a negative impact on our well-being and we just don’t know it because sometimes our minds are set in different ways. I also agree that people don’t really see the bad stuff that comes with their posts, like we can only see the good stuff and that has an impact too. All of these are great points, thank you for sharing! ❤

    Liked by 8 people

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    1. People do tend to base their happiness on other peoples lives without basing off their own lives. I think it’s a natural human thing we do, maybe not even on purpose. It takes a while to reprogram our brains into thinking differently. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us!

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  10. These are really good points! I really like point 4, and it’s something I do a lot. Knowing that one of my friends achieved something great whether its getting a top job, getting good grades, starting a business makes me inspired and makes me motivated to work hard and do something great as well!

    I do think comparison to others can be good if it is healthy and helps everyone push themselves and be the best version of themselves. However, its when the comparison is damaging and leads to jealousy is when comparison is a big no no

    Your point 2 is very true as well. Take for example now. A lot of people right now are posting their great first class degrees on facebook, and how they are proud of it. You may feel jealous by this, but you may not realise that they are feeling stressed about job hunting in this current climate, which they will not post about. They will only post the good things that have happened in their lives. Another thing I would like to add to point 2. Its important taking a step back and thinking if the source of comparison is really social media or if its something else. If it is social media think about ways you can use social media better (e.g. only using facebook to message people on facebook messenger)

    This is a good choice of topic, thanks for sharing!

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    1. Its really hard sometimes to get into those mindsets. Its hard to see others excelling and feeling like you aren’t. Saying and doing are for sure two separate things. I think using others success as your motivation really helps. I see bloggers with way more followers and engagement than me and I use it as motivation to get where they are one day!
      Its all about perspective and how you look at things.
      Thanks for your comment!

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  13. Great post 💜 I used to compare myself to others all the time, now I wouldn’t change who I am or my life for anything. I blog but believe it or not I do not use any form of social media for my personal life, I which plays a big role in comparison nowadays. It’s so easy to compare your life to someone who shows you the best and polished parts of theirs online. We all have something to be thankful for. 💜

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    1. Thank you!
      I think I need to take a leaf out of your book. I think people who don’t have social media are so much happier in themselves and it makes so much sense. You don’t have anybody to compare yourself to. I guess you’re sort of shielding yourself from seeing things, which I think is a good thing.
      We really do, were alive and breathing today, thats enough to be thankful for in itself 💖

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  15. I think sometimes people have two lives. A social media life and who they really are. So comparing ourselves to someone’s portrayal of blurred flaws on social media ultimately leads to unhealthy feedback about ourselves and should completely be avoided💚

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  21. Thank you Olivia!!! Your posts seem to come at just the right time ❤ I’ve been comparing my blog with the success of others. Wondering what am I doing wrong?! But I’m happy to say I’ve also used it as a huge motovational boost to keep working hard at something I love so much. Knowing it will get there one day. No one was born successful, success is earned. We may have been born with its potential but each of us have to work hard for it.
    Not too long ago I disabled my Facebook and it has been one of the best decisions. Its very liberating! It was that feeling you get when you’re finally able to take off your face mask. Relieving, like you can breathe fresh air again! Maybe I’ll go back to it someday.
    Great job!

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    1. Please don’t ever do that. You are where you are at right now for a reason. You will reach your goals through hard work and determination. Your blog is you. Nobody else 💕 and thats your power. Nobody else is you!

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  25. Absolutely fantastic post Liv! Like really and truly! I used to do that and it was like there was not a single thing that was good about me, but then as I stopped doing that and my mama helped me too since this was really bad for me, I’ve been absolutely doing fab now because ain’t nobody got time for that. (no time for looking at what they have and I don’t)😂 I LOVE LOVE LOVEEEEDDDD reading this post and I’m sure it made people smile and just not do that anymore or just improve even if it has to be a teeny bit! I’m so thankful for reading your wonderful posts!

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. I’m so glad you learnt to overcome those feelings. You are you and nobody else has the power to take that from you. You are an incredible person who is so worthy, and im so thankful that this post made you smile 🥰

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  28. That post made me think. I look for the good points in others and try to see how I can improve myself. The bad points help me to look at myself too to see if that’s what others see in me and then I try and correct those bad points. I really don’t care if people are better looking or richer and am content with what I have. You have some good advice on your blog. Excellent!

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  29. Great suggestions and reminders! Comparing myself to others was a way I grounded myself in my reality. It took me years to learn I should only be comparing me with me. Am I farther than I was the day before with no judgment. Liked this! 💕🦋

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  32. Pingback: 4 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others – Olivia Lucie Blake | The Reluctant Poet

  33. It took me a long while to as you said “invest” in myself. I think we all need to do it —believe me, the results are always great!
    This is one of my favourite quotes: “Compare yourself with who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today”
    🧡✨xx

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