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Olivia Lucie Blake

Musings of a Millennial. Life, The World and Everything In Between.

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4 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others

04/08/2020

We all do it, whether we realise it or not. We compare ourselves to others. “I wish I had her hair. I wish I had his abs. I wish I was that confident”. Well believe it or not, I bet somebody has said that about you too at some point. Self love isn’t something that just happens overnight. It can take some time to learn how to be confident in who you are. So I decided to create a list of things we can do as people instead of comparing ourselves to others.

1. Invest in Yourself

When we compare ourselves to others, we are focusing on somebody else’s life and not our own.That isn’t going to help us become better. Remember The grass is green where you water it. Remember who you are and how amazing you are, and if nobody has told you that today then here is your reminder from me.

You are amazing, your body woke you up this morning. You are going to accomplish great things today.

2. Take Time Away From Technology

I have found that lack of confidence can come from the constant scrolling through social media. Remember social media is just a highlight roll of everybody’s lives. People don’t show the bad and the ugly, only the exciting and perfectly photoshopped side. Take time away from technology. Be present in the now.

3. Be Grateful

You are alive, you are breathing, you are loved. Be grateful for your current circumstances (of course this is not applicable in all circumstances). You are where you are meant to be right now. Don’t look at what other people have and desire that, look around at what you have and be thankful for it. Even if they are small things like food, a home or a loving family. You are blessed more than you can imagine.

4. Get Inspired

Instead of wishing that you have what they have, let it inspire you. Let that be your goal and something for you to look to. It’s always great to have goals and want to accomplish more. Don’t let jealously get in the way of how great you could be too. Its not just achievable for others, its achievable for you too!

Do you struggle in comparing yourself to others? How do you overcome this? Are there any tips you can share with us?

Olivia x

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Comments

  1. Anjali Khanal

    04/08/2020 at 11:11 AM

    Many people need to read this ❤️

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 11:29 AM

      I agree! 💖

      Reply
  2. writingwithanopenheart

    04/08/2020 at 11:14 AM

    ♥

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 11:29 AM

      Thanks for reblogging!

      Reply
  3. Shruti

    04/08/2020 at 11:21 AM

    The grass is green where you water it – is so much better than the grass is greener on the ohter side. Love this post!

    Reply
    • Shruti

      04/08/2020 at 11:22 AM

      Other*

      Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 11:30 AM

      I agree too! Glad you liked this post!

      Reply
  4. Elle

    04/08/2020 at 11:29 AM

    I totally agree with this, and I think that number 2 has to be given a highlight when it comes to self love. There is this thing, psychologically speaking, that people tend to base their happiness on reference points and we are bad at having the right reference points, in the case of number 2, people actually tend to base their happiness on other people’s lives, and that’s the thing about social media, it has a negative impact on our well-being and we just don’t know it because sometimes our minds are set in different ways. I also agree that people don’t really see the bad stuff that comes with their posts, like we can only see the good stuff and that has an impact too. All of these are great points, thank you for sharing! <3

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 11:33 AM

      People do tend to base their happiness on other peoples lives without basing off their own lives. I think it’s a natural human thing we do, maybe not even on purpose. It takes a while to reprogram our brains into thinking differently. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us!

      Reply
      • Elle

        04/08/2020 at 11:50 AM

        Exactly, you’re welcome!

  5. Aushi

    04/08/2020 at 11:44 AM

    I really enjoyed reading it..
    The point you mentioned were too good
    Forwarding more powers to you 😊
    Keep it up
    Stay safe, stay healthy and happy 🎊💐🎊

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 11:49 AM

      Thank you so much! I appreciate your kind words! 🤗

      Reply
  6. M. Zeeshan Horani

    04/08/2020 at 11:51 AM

    Very good thought
    I wrote on same topic too
    No doubt this topic should address more and more to give more awareness

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 12:07 PM

      I’ll have to check out what you have written!
      I agree it should, its a big issue in our world today!

      Reply
      • M. Zeeshan Horani

        04/08/2020 at 2:15 PM

        Yes indeed
        Thanks a lot
        God bless you

      • M. Zeeshan Horani

        07/08/2020 at 5:15 PM

        Hi Olivia,
        I have nominated you for Vincent Ehidero Blogging Award as I found your blog amazing.
        Please checkout https://hafizzeeshan.wordpress.com/2020/08/07/my-1st-vincent-ehindero-blogger-award/
        Hope you like it and keep inspiring✍️

      • Olivia

        07/08/2020 at 5:19 PM

        Thank you so much!! I’ll be posting all of my blogger nomination posts tomorrow ☺️☺️ i appreciate it!

  7. Maya

    04/08/2020 at 12:00 PM

    Very thoughtful.

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 12:07 PM

      Thank you, im glad you thought so!

      Reply
      • Maya

        04/08/2020 at 12:26 PM

        🙏

  8. Addy

    04/08/2020 at 12:00 PM

    Yes, we should invest on ourselves but in things that are meaningful. Forget fad diets and click bait make-up.

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 12:07 PM

      I agree! Investing in meaningful things are so much more beneficial!

      Reply
  9. nirajshah2003

    04/08/2020 at 12:13 PM

    These are really good points! I really like point 4, and it’s something I do a lot. Knowing that one of my friends achieved something great whether its getting a top job, getting good grades, starting a business makes me inspired and makes me motivated to work hard and do something great as well!

    I do think comparison to others can be good if it is healthy and helps everyone push themselves and be the best version of themselves. However, its when the comparison is damaging and leads to jealousy is when comparison is a big no no

    Your point 2 is very true as well. Take for example now. A lot of people right now are posting their great first class degrees on facebook, and how they are proud of it. You may feel jealous by this, but you may not realise that they are feeling stressed about job hunting in this current climate, which they will not post about. They will only post the good things that have happened in their lives. Another thing I would like to add to point 2. Its important taking a step back and thinking if the source of comparison is really social media or if its something else. If it is social media think about ways you can use social media better (e.g. only using facebook to message people on facebook messenger)

    This is a good choice of topic, thanks for sharing!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 12:17 PM

      Its really hard sometimes to get into those mindsets. Its hard to see others excelling and feeling like you aren’t. Saying and doing are for sure two separate things. I think using others success as your motivation really helps. I see bloggers with way more followers and engagement than me and I use it as motivation to get where they are one day!
      Its all about perspective and how you look at things.
      Thanks for your comment!

      Reply
  10. mentalhealth360.uk

    04/08/2020 at 12:49 PM

    Thoughtful and insightful post, Olivia, and more people need to think this way 🙂

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 12:51 PM

      Thank you so much! I agree, we all do. Its all a learning curve for us all 😊

      Reply
  11. Hemalatha Ramesh

    04/08/2020 at 1:00 PM

    I agree with everything that you listed!
    Hope it reaches everyone who’s in need of this!❤️

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 1:02 PM

      I hope it does too 💕 Thank you for reading!

      Reply
  12. Calluna’s World

    04/08/2020 at 1:16 PM

    Great post 💜 I used to compare myself to others all the time, now I wouldn’t change who I am or my life for anything. I blog but believe it or not I do not use any form of social media for my personal life, I which plays a big role in comparison nowadays. It’s so easy to compare your life to someone who shows you the best and polished parts of theirs online. We all have something to be thankful for. 💜

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 1:20 PM

      Thank you!
      I think I need to take a leaf out of your book. I think people who don’t have social media are so much happier in themselves and it makes so much sense. You don’t have anybody to compare yourself to. I guess you’re sort of shielding yourself from seeing things, which I think is a good thing.
      We really do, were alive and breathing today, thats enough to be thankful for in itself 💖

      Reply
  13. Nishabd_The unexpressed

    04/08/2020 at 1:49 PM

    Again very relevant.
    I think we should never see what is there in other’s plate and focus on our hunger.
    If you are in bad times, remember , this to shall pass.
    If you are in good times, remember, live in the moment for this too shall pass

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 1:54 PM

      Great points you shared there! Thank you!

      Reply
      • Nishabd_The unexpressed

        04/08/2020 at 1:55 PM

        Thanks. Let us increase the army of ppl spreading positivity

      • Olivia

        04/08/2020 at 1:55 PM

        Agreed!

  14. Joel Abakah

    04/08/2020 at 2:38 PM

    I think sometimes people have two lives. A social media life and who they really are. So comparing ourselves to someone’s portrayal of blurred flaws on social media ultimately leads to unhealthy feedback about ourselves and should completely be avoided💚

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 2:40 PM

      No truer words have been spoken. We are comparing ourselves to a lie. 👍🏻

      Reply
  15. francisashis

    04/08/2020 at 2:47 PM

    This is a wow post!You have brought out the exact points of our addiction to different attitudes and digital gadgets. Thank you very much for the motivating post.Take care.🌹👍🙏

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 2:55 PM

      Thank you so much for reading. I’m so glad you found it useful and relevant.

      Reply
      • francisashis

        04/08/2020 at 2:57 PM

        Yes it is really very soulful post,I mean it’s the need of the hour for all the aspiring bloggers .Most welcome.

      • Olivia

        04/08/2020 at 3:00 PM

        Thank you so much 😊

  16. francisashis

    04/08/2020 at 3:01 PM

    Most welcome.🌹👍🙏

    Reply
  17. blondeyonamission

    04/08/2020 at 3:27 PM

    This was such a great post!! People need to read this❤️❤️

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 3:40 PM

      Thank u so much 🥰

      Reply
  18. Kally

    04/08/2020 at 3:57 PM

    Once again, awesome tips from you!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 3:57 PM

      Thank you so much Kally 🤗

      Reply
  19. eagerellie1

    04/08/2020 at 3:57 PM

    Nice job on this!🤩

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 3:58 PM

      Thank you 💖

      Reply
  20. itsmisselizabeth

    04/08/2020 at 4:22 PM

    Thank you Olivia!!! Your posts seem to come at just the right time ❤ I’ve been comparing my blog with the success of others. Wondering what am I doing wrong?! But I’m happy to say I’ve also used it as a huge motovational boost to keep working hard at something I love so much. Knowing it will get there one day. No one was born successful, success is earned. We may have been born with its potential but each of us have to work hard for it.
    Not too long ago I disabled my Facebook and it has been one of the best decisions. Its very liberating! It was that feeling you get when you’re finally able to take off your face mask. Relieving, like you can breathe fresh air again! Maybe I’ll go back to it someday.
    Great job!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 5:37 PM

      Please don’t ever do that. You are where you are at right now for a reason. You will reach your goals through hard work and determination. Your blog is you. Nobody else 💕 and thats your power. Nobody else is you!

      Reply
  21. A Work In Progress

    04/08/2020 at 4:36 PM

    Great post, I really enjoyed reading it. It’s a reminder we all need to hear sometimes😊

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 5:36 PM

      It is! Thank you for reading!!

      Reply
  22. Cheri Garduño

    04/08/2020 at 4:55 PM

    Great content!!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 5:36 PM

      Thank you so much😊😊

      Reply
  23. sonali4465

    04/08/2020 at 5:56 PM

    So beautifully you have written. Loved it. 🌸

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 6:06 PM

      Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed 💕

      Reply
  24. Cookie Girl

    04/08/2020 at 7:55 PM

    Absolutely fantastic post Liv! Like really and truly! I used to do that and it was like there was not a single thing that was good about me, but then as I stopped doing that and my mama helped me too since this was really bad for me, I’ve been absolutely doing fab now because ain’t nobody got time for that. (no time for looking at what they have and I don’t)😂 I LOVE LOVE LOVEEEEDDDD reading this post and I’m sure it made people smile and just not do that anymore or just improve even if it has to be a teeny bit! I’m so thankful for reading your wonderful posts!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 8:21 PM

      I’m so glad you learnt to overcome those feelings. You are you and nobody else has the power to take that from you. You are an incredible person who is so worthy, and im so thankful that this post made you smile 🥰

      Reply
      • Cookie Girl

        04/08/2020 at 8:22 PM

        Awww, thank you so much for your kind words! You bloom my day!

  25. Stine Writing

    04/08/2020 at 9:47 PM

    All very good advice. I used to compare myself so much but I do like who I am and try to be happy with me.

    Reply
    • Olivia

      04/08/2020 at 10:34 PM

      Thank you! I’m glad you were able to overcome that!

      Reply
      • Olivia

        04/08/2020 at 10:34 PM

        Thank you Navin!

      • Stine Writing

        05/08/2020 at 3:07 AM

        Yes, it took many, many years but…

  26. Navin

    04/08/2020 at 9:58 PM

    That’s a great post, Olivia…insightful ❤️

    Reply
    • Olivia

      05/08/2020 at 7:59 AM

      Thank you Navin!

      Reply
  27. ianscyberspace

    05/08/2020 at 2:23 AM

    That post made me think. I look for the good points in others and try to see how I can improve myself. The bad points help me to look at myself too to see if that’s what others see in me and then I try and correct those bad points. I really don’t care if people are better looking or richer and am content with what I have. You have some good advice on your blog. Excellent!

    Reply
    • Olivia

      05/08/2020 at 8:00 AM

      If only people thought more like you do!
      We should all take a leaf out of your book and be content with where we are at currently!
      Thank you for your kind words!

      Reply
  28. thewanderingempath

    05/08/2020 at 4:18 AM

    Great suggestions and reminders! Comparing myself to others was a way I grounded myself in my reality. It took me years to learn I should only be comparing me with me. Am I farther than I was the day before with no judgment. Liked this! 💕🦋

    Reply
    • Olivia

      05/08/2020 at 8:01 AM

      It does take a while doesnt it! Its a learning process, one that i’m still doing now!
      Thank you for commenting💕

      Reply
  29. Princess

    05/08/2020 at 12:21 PM

    This is exactly what I need today. I’m actually feeling down lately, and been dipping on a puddle of self-pity. Thank you for sharing this. ❤️

    Reply
    • Olivia

      05/08/2020 at 12:26 PM

      I’m so sorry you’re feeling that way but glad i could play a part in improving your mood. Please if you ever want somebody to talk to, i’m a great listener 💕

      Reply
      • Princess

        06/08/2020 at 8:35 AM

        Thank you so much Olivia. 😢 You just made my day lighter. Please know that I truly appreciate this 💕

      • Olivia

        06/08/2020 at 9:15 AM

        You’re so welcome! I hope you start to feel better soon!

  30. chattykerry

    05/08/2020 at 10:41 PM

    It is as though you wrote this just for me… I am struggling with self-image and comparisons. Great post.

    Reply
    • Olivia

      05/08/2020 at 10:42 PM

      I’m sorry you’re going through that. Remember how amazing you are and how nobody else is you & that is your power 😊

      Reply
      • chattykerry

        06/08/2020 at 6:54 PM

        Thank you so much, Olivia – I appreciate your comment.

  31. Shahrin

    08/08/2020 at 11:53 AM

    It took me a long while to as you said “invest” in myself. I think we all need to do it —believe me, the results are always great!
    This is one of my favourite quotes: “Compare yourself with who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today”
    🧡✨xx

    Reply
    • Olivia

      08/08/2020 at 1:55 PM

      Oh i love that quote! It’s so true isnt it 💖

      Reply

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