If you can relate to this post, and you have been through the stages of grief and I am right there with you. Losing someone from your life is really one of the hardest things I have ever had to go through. Grief is different for everyone, no two people go through the same process. One of the things that I never understood was that I was never prepared for the death of someone in my life. Death isn’t a subject thats taught at school, and thats for obvious reasons. But I don’t ever remember a time where death/grief was really explained to me.
Of course I knew what dying was, but never knew the impacts it could have on the people that were left behind. I think that death and grief needs to be a something taught to younger people to make them prepared for life. Because thats a reality for alot of us. We will face people dying and we will face grief at some point in our lives.
This is why I wanted to share these things with you all. The things nobody ever tells you about before you lose someone.
IT’S A LONG PROCESS
The process of losing someone you love and grieving your loss is a long one. It never really leaves you, it stays with you for the rest of your life. I was never prepared for how long it would actually take for normal life to resume and my new life to begin. My advice is to not rush it, take your time. A major life change has happened, you don’t get over something like that quickly.
IT MIGHT BE CONFUSING
You’ve probably never been through these emotions before, or maybe you have and now you’re older but it doesn’t mean that it will be the same. If you’ve lost many people in life, I can bet that the grief you went through for each person was different. Going through the emotions that come with it can be a confusing time. One minute you’re okay and dealing with it, next you’re angry and wanting to scream.
All of these emotions are normal and are what you need to do, to get through it.
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It’s quite a cliche thing to say, but time really does heal when it comes to grief. I never believed this and always said it would never be better and would never become easier for me, but it did. Time really works wonders and allows you to slowly get back to your new normal. It might not be a quick process, but its a process that needs to take time. It’s not something to be rushed.
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IT MIGHT GET HARDER BEFORE IT GETS BETTER
Healing in any circumstance might feel worse before it feels better, and the same can be said for grief. It might get harder and harder as the time passes but eventually things will become better for you. If you’re in the throws of grief now, know this for certain that you will get through it. Remembering to be kind to yourself is really important.
LIFE WON’T BE THE SAME
Life is different now and won’t ever be the same. However, it doesn’t always mean life is worse. Things happen in life for a reason. You might not know the reason yet, but you will. When I lost my best friend, I didnt understand why but I now know. Going through that process actually helped me to become more emotional and in touch my with my emotions. Before I’d never cry or show my emotions and now I cant stop. Which is not a bad thing.
We find ourselves in these situations that are terrible, but we can always learn from them.
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What are some things you learnt going through grief? Do you have anything you’d like to share?
Grief can be something thats really hard to talk about, and for a while I would shy away from talking about my grief and my loss. But please don’t ever feel like you’re alone. Almost everyone you meet will have gone through loss at some point in their lives. Were all in this together.