Something I noticed during my weight loss journey is how people treated me different after losing weight. As many of you know, I have been on my fitness journey now for nearly 9 months. I have had to continuously learn better eating habits without letting old habits creep back in. And throughout this journey I have learnt so much about myself and who I am.
When I look back to my bigger body and my smaller body now, I don’t think I treated myself any differently. I still struggle now with some of the same insecurities I did when I was bigger. But I know I don’t love myself differently. I love myself the same now as I did back then. Which is why its surprising to me when I started to notice how others started acting towards me as I got smaller.
Generally we know that smaller, more petite bodies are accepted in society. Its all we see on the front of magazines and online. Its plastered in our faces that we must look a certain way to be considered beautiful. Which confused me a little. Because here I am, loving my fat body and loving my small body. Why is that I am able to do that but everybody else can’t?
As the pounds continue to fall of my body, I started to slowly notice how people were acting towards me. Even walking down the street, the unwanted attention creeped up a little more and I noticed more likes and attention on social media too.
I GET MORE ATTENTION
Obviously there are men and women in this world that love and adore women with bigger bodies. But ever since losing weight I couldn’t help but notice that the men I used to be ignored by, now want to speak with me and get to know me. Being bigger must have been more of a deterrent to men. I’ve even had comments when I have lost weight before from guys telling me that I am “sexier now.” Those kind of comments aren’t needed and quite frankly are rude.
It’s like you become more popular and people want to be your friend and get to know you just because of how you look. It’s such a weird concept when you think about it. I know there are people who have preferences for bodies on those they are attracted to. Which is fine. But my mindset is, if you didn’t want me before, I don’t want you now.
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PEOPLE FEEL COMFORTABLE COMMENTING ON YOUR BODY
When you lose weight of course those around you start to notice. They tell you how good you look and ask how you’ve achieved it. Those kind of comments are welcome. But it becomes an issue when people make comments about you continuing to lose more. I have heard comments like “are you going to lose more?! you don’t need to lose more.” Since when is it okay to comment on anybodies weight?
There is this misconception that when you lose weight and workout you just do it to be smaller. Which for me was never the case. Yes I wanted to lose weight but my focus is not just losing weight. I want to be fitter and healthier from the inside and out. So yes, the weight loss is great but its about the bigger picture. So next time you think it’s acceptable to comment on someone else’s body. Don’t.
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I AM TREATED WITH MORE KINDNESS
One thing I noticed quite quickly when I started losing weight was so people were kinder to me. The compliments and love came rolling in quickly, and although it was great for my ego it was confusing why only now people decided to be nicer to me. Humans deserve kindness regardless of what they look like. That should be the standard we all have as people. No matter how big or small your body is, you deserve to be loved. And I think this is the one I struggle with the most.
I have been both sides. And honestly, people do treat you differently.
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People treated me different after losing weight and I don’t think its right. Have you ever experienced this? What are your thoughts on this topic?
When I first started to notice that people treated me different after losing weight I thought it was all in my head. But after speaking to others, I realise its such a common theme of people who have lost weight too. It makes me feel so sad that people aren’t loved and accepted in their bodies as they are. Why should we change to become more accepted by others? We should be loved regardless. And thats something I think we all need to look at.
Olivia x
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It takes lot of courage to post thing like that! I’m happy you are happy!
Although i would like to know why you think it’s rude when someone tells you that “you are sexier”.
It should be a compliment, right? Or am i missing something?
P.S.: You have a great blog!
Telling someone they are more attractive or appealing just because they lost weight is not a compliment. It just makes you feel as though you were never good enough when you were bigger
Yes, you are right. Anyway, i saw one of your latest post when you posted fotos of you in two different times. Let me tell you: the progress are very visible! Keep pushing!
Thank you!
Just wait until people start throwing skinny hate at you. I’ve been told “you need to eat a cheeseburger” too many times. I eat, I just take care of my body and eat fruits, veggies, lean meats, and nuts. haha Glad you’re having good experiences so far.
People really have no right commenting on others bodies. Big or small.
Right?!
I’ve noticed this a lot. It can effect so many things even job interviews which is really sad to think about.
I haven’t ever heard of that before. I surely hope the size of peoples bodies don’t effect them getting jobs.
I’ve been on a fitness journey too over the last two year. I’ve always been slim but didn’t used to have any fitness. I hated the assumptions that slim meant fit and the “skinny b*tch” friendly comments that weren’t actually so friendly. No one’s noticed that I’m fitter than I was, no one has commented. But I feel so much better in myself. I’ve learnt that my body can do so much more than I realised. I’ve even run a half marathon! My husband’s just lost 2 stone through diet and exercise and he’s feeling good too, enjoying the compliments for now.
Well done on making a change for yourself and for enjoying the way you feel now.
I really hate that aswell. People label bigger people as being unhealthy and smaller as being healthier. Alot of the smaller people I know are really unhealthy. I’m bigger than them, but they would still consider me to be unhealthy if they had to choose between us. It makes no sense.
I relate to this 100%! I’ve been on a weight loss/healthier me journey for a couple years now and when I first started to lose weight everyone told me how fantastic I looked but the person on the inside never changed. At first I was like oh thanks and after a while I felt sad that I was only getting complimented for being thinner!
Its such a weird feeling isn’t it?! I cant even explain how it makes you feel.
Unfortunately, we live in a superficial world. And consumerism doesn’t help. Think of the millions brainwashed by TV and print ad models! It’s no wonder fast food came along (to fatten us up! Kidding.)
Oh, I am thrilled you are releasing excess weight (for your health), and because I know it isn’t easy for most. I have tried so many weight loss methods (fads, detoxing, working out, and more) for nearly 20 years! I lose 20 – 30 pounds and then it creeps back on. I have 50 to go!
Happy Thanksgiving! ❤️🦋🌀
Yep you are so right we really do!
I feel awesome reading your posts. I only just started my fitness journey this week and hope I can persevere till the end.
And yes, I get what you’re saying. I just want to feel good about myself. More confident and that’s all.
Did I hear thin? No, thanks I like myself alright 😂
This makes me so happy 🙌🏻🙌🏻 Good luck with your journey!
It’s sad fact of life that we all judge people based on appearances first. It’s the conditioning we’ve received most of our lives from media and society on a whole. I agree that people shouldn’t be commenting on your weight because it can feel uncomfortable. But I’m glad you are enjoying your healthier you journey. Happy Thanksgiving.
This is a sad reality in a fat-shaming society. Hopefully, the uprising of social awareness will change things, just like there is the feminist movement, and the efforts to destigmatize mental illnesses.
“So next time you think it’s acceptable to comment on someone else’s body. Don’t.” My favorite line of this whole post!! Even people who are “skinny” get rude comments too when they gain or lose weight. I don’t understand why people think it’s ok to make comments about other people’s bodies. But it does take a lot of courage to make a post like this!
With regards to the men, there is definitely the preference part that plays a huge role. But another thing could be that your confidence picked up as you lost more weight. We’ve chatted about this, and even the clothes you wear are way different. Seeing a confidence person who is ‘feeling themselves’ is definitely a turn on regardless of your preference in body type. Just a thought 😉