At some point in all of our lives we will have encountered negative people, but I hope in your life you have encountered more positive than negative. Negativity is just something that comes with life, not everyone is on the same wave length or life path as you. Whether these people are in your work place, in your school class or even online, it’s important that were aware of the types of people who are out there, so that we can look out for them and avoid them. My intention with this post isn’t for it to be all negative. I think my intention here is more of a warning, for us to be all looking out for these types of people so that they don’t get a chance to infiltrate our lives.
The people you surround yourself with have such a great impact on your life, whether you think they do or not. They help to shape who you are, and the saying “you are who you surround yourself with” it’s so true. To lead a positive and fulfilling life, its important that your circle reflects you and your beliefs and morals. Negative people drag you down, they don’t lift you up.
I have complied a list of four types of negative people you should stay away from. There are so many more I could have added, but I want you to add some contributions to the comments section once you have read this post!
THE NARCISSIST
If you are not familiar with what a narcissist is, let me take a second to explain. To name a few, these are the traits found in narcissists:
– Have an exaggerated sense of self-importance
– Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration
– Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people
– Exaggerate achievements and talents
If you want to do more of a deep dive into narcissism then please click here, and it will go into more detail.
I have dealt with a few narcissists in my life, and they are not a pleasure to be around. They’re very controlling, want everything their way. They are gossipers, unkind and just generally not nice people. Often the relationships they have with others are really toxic. Alot of narcissists are the way they are due to something happening in their lives. A major life event or someone who hurt them in the past. Hurt people, hurt people, and thats exactly what a narcissistic person does. This of course does not condone their behaviour, there are other avenues and healthy ways to deal with trauma.
THE COMPLAINER
I’m sure we have all been around complainers and rolled our eyes every time a moaning sentence comes from their mouth. Being around a complainer is really exhausting and frustrating. Especially when they are moaning about very trivial and unimportant things. They tend to drain our energy and leave us feeling negative after being around them.
I worked in customer service for five years of my life and know first hand how complainers are. And the sad thing is alot of them will remain this way for a long time. Once a complainer usually means always a complainer.
THE JUDGEMENTAL
The last thing you want in a friend or relationship is someone who judges you. In any relationship you want to be comfortable in yourself and being who you are around them. A judgemental person never does it from a place of love, its always from a place of negativity. Alot of the times judgemental people are unhappy with themselves, which is why they tend to judge others first.
There are ways to approach someone if what you think they’re doing is wrong, but judging them and casting judgement to them is not the way to do it. You must be perfect yourself first to be able to judge anybody else, and we know that none of us are perfect.
THE UNSUPPORTIVE
Have you ever had good news and shared it with a friend, only to find that their enthusiasm isn’t matched and their response isn’t as you had hoped? Then this is for you. That sense of disappointment when their face doesn’t light up as yours did really hurts and hits you in the gut. This has happened so many times to me and is probably why I tend to lead a very private life. I never understood why another person, especially a friend or loved one, wouldn’t be happy for you when something good happens. Alot of the time it comes from jealousy, and them wishing it was happening to them. We are all human and feel some type of jealously at some point, but I feel it’s more important to be supportive.
What type of negative people do you tend to hide away from? Have you got any other experiences or lists of traits you could add to this list?
I usually post positive and upbeat content, but I find its important to be real too. Not everything is rainbows and sunshine. We will come in contact with negative people in every walk of life, and I think we need to be aware of those types of people we should stay away from or cut from our lives.
Olivia x
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Staying away from these people is a must thing! Stay away from negative and grasp the positives! 😊😊
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Right on!
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Yess! We need to hold onto the good people and things in our lives!
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Yes 😊😊
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At least for me, the judgmental people are the worst! It’s not that the others aren’t just as bad but unfortunately, I’ve encountered a lot of them 😦
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They really are aren’t they, especially when it doesnt come from a place of love either.
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Amazing thoughts..Valid points!
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Thank you!
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Such great advice – negative people zap your energy! 👏
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They’re like a sponge, and they soak up all of your joy!
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About negative I have two quotes I use:
“Friendship is more valuable than all Ships.” -Van Prince
(on the other side of that coin)
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So true👏🏼
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“Negative people are counter productive to progress.” =Van Prince
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I avoid narcissists, they’re so so draining😩 great post
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They really are, and I feel like you can spot them from a mile off once you have encountered one!
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100%!
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I try to avoid all of these but the judgemental ones are the worst!!
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I agree!
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I’ve definitely met all these types of negative people in school. Now I’ve finally left them.
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So glad you were able to walk away from them. I’m sure you feel better for it!
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Another one I would add to this is the people who are unreliable all the time. Sure you can’t be 100% reliable all the time and we all slip up, but things like spilling secrets to others when you promised to keep it a secret, or constantly saying you will do something for a friend and then not doing it are red flags
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Yeah for sure, unreliable people aren’t people you want to be friends with!
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I have historically been a positive person but I also have some depression that makes me feel and react in a negative way. This is a season of life I guess.
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It is a season of life. I know mental illnesses can effect the way we handle things, and its something that we cant help sometimes. I think its making yourself aware of your actions and trying at least to correct yourself when you do fly off the handle. Its a learning process for all of us!
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Nice post. These are people we really need to stay away from and can be harmful to our vibe and how we view ourselves.
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Yes, they all can be so harmful to our vibe. Its best to steer clear of them!
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I avoid narcissists, they can make you feel very small very quickly! Unfortunately I have been judgmental with friends and it does come from a place of love. I love some of them like I love family and some of their decisions have led me to become judgemental especially if I know that they know they are making the wrong decisions which leads them to become unhappy and I’m the one picking up the pieces and being the shoulder to cry on. It’s difficult when I have my own stuff to deal with.
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I think doing it out of love is way different than doing it from a bad place. Often you aren’t really judging them, you’re advising them and warning them of what they’re doing. You aren’t thinking they’re a bad person for it, you’re wanting them to become better which is why you’re giving advice.
Its really hard seeing loved ones do the wrong thing, but sometimes they have to make their own mistakes and learn from it. Being a friend is about picking up the pieces time and time again. It gets tiring but its what we do!
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Thanks for this. I recommend people to stay away form negative people and send them love and light from a distance.
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Thanks so much for reading!
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I have experienced all of these types of people. I think it’s also important to recognise that in the past I have had moments of these behaviours towards others as well. This is when I was a lot younger and didnt understand how to break away from people in a healthy, mature way. A lot of the time it comes from our own insecurities. I’m sure we’ve all been these people and different times in our life and its good to recognise that and see how much we have grown xx
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Yes, we for sure have to look at ourselves and see that we will have acted this way to other people too. Its important that we grow from this type of behaviour, but its great to recognise that nobody is perfect! xx
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Some authors make this complicated. You summed it up very well. Avoiding or managing contacts with those people is empowering.
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Thank you so much! It truly is one the most empowering things to do.
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I would consider this positive content! after all, this is what we need less of in life. Once we begin ridding ourselves of the bad and negative, we’re left with people who uplift.
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Thank you. I always worry about posting things that aren’t the conventional ‘positive’ content. Our lives are better when we get rid of the negative people!
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Without a doubt!
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SO 👏🏼 TRUE 👏🏼
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🙌🏼
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Some people don’t mean to be that way. Age is hard but it does allow you to speak your mind and I do now. With some, you can’t but where I can, I do.
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I think whether you mean to be that way or not, its about recognising that the behaviour isn’t right or isn’t what you need. Whether someone intentionally is judgemental or not, they are still judgemental and its not someone I want to personally be around!
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Ughhh I truly hate the judgmental ones who at the same time also a hypocrite. 😅 it’s truly important to surround ourselves with people who is good for us and for our mental health.
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Yes me too!! Its one of the most beneficial things I have learnt as I have grown older. Who you surround yourself with is really important.
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I feel the narcissist is the most negative/toxic of the group and the one who cannot really change… Also, let’s acknowledge that we all exhibit these negative traits every now and then and we might be the negative person to stay away from in someone’s life🙈 x
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Yes👏🏻👏🏻, a little self reflection never hurt anybody. Thanks for mentioning that. We often forget to look inwards!
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They really do, they bring the mood down quickly!
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I truly dislike unsupportive people —it took me a while to recognise it and when I did, it transform my life. This post is so important —we need people around us who will lift us up 🧡✨ xx
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Me too! They’re probably the worst kind of person in my opinion. Especially when its an unsupportive friend!
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I believe you are very much ”in tune”. Very concise and sensible. Once again thank you🎶. I’m an old guy, and your thoughts are good stuff. I learned this a long time ago: ” Positive thoughts bring me benefits and advantages I desire. Negative thoughts have no influence over me at any level of my mind”. Be well❤️
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Thanks so much for commenting 🥰
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Well written and definitely true! I used to be the complainer… my ex used to say “you’re always complaining” about a thousand times a day 🙈
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Well clearly you had alot of things to complain about when you were with them!
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🙌🏾 and with that you dropped the mic! 👌🏾
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👇🏼🎙
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Oh damn, we’ve all encountered these people in our lives! I think it’s important to recognise that people might be feeling a certain way that makes them behave like the above but they aren’t ACTUALLY that person. If that makes sense? Like I know when I’m going through a really tough time myself, I can be a bit unsupportive of others. But I’m usually mega supportive – it’s just because I don’t have the mental capability to do it in that moment.
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I 100% understand this! Sometimes people have tough moments or moments where they aren’t supportive or nice people etc, and we have all been there. None of us are perfect!
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So important for us not to be one of those types…especially the judgemental one. Always be the person we want to see in another.
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Yes! For sure!
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Kudos! A very well written post in my view. I think your categories are a little black and white though. I believe that all of us are bit narcissistic, complainy, unsupportive and judgey. I made up a couple of words. I think what u might meant to say, extreme in those areas tend to thrive in negativity.
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I agree too they are. I think i’d be here all day listing off all the other things I could have mentioned. At some point in our lives we all show those characteristics, and i would say they are negative but they dont make us negative or bad people. They were for sure in extreme cases! Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
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Another guilty part is the hypochondriac.
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Oh yes!
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Finished my 7 years relationship with an abusive Narcissist, leave me with scars in my soul and PTSD.
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But you had the courage to finish it. I hope you find peace and healing on this new journey you are now on. I wish you all the best!
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Oh my gosh the unsupportive 😭 RUN!
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Yesss for real!
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Yeah ! Your article is bang on right to the real world. Negative people are energy suckers and really contagious. We need someone like you to remind us time and again to scan our surroundings and run an anti-virus on these bugs.
Very nice! Indeed.
Narcissist are more a problem. They sound supportive and all they want is praise and praise for everything, even being born on the planet. The complainer can be adjusted for a short duration by turning a deaf year but in the long run even the complainer will turn you into a negative person.
It is all what we decide to make us into and whom we listen to. Is our mind a public bus or a private jet? You Decide. 🙂
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https://rajatjhingan.wordpress.com/
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I like to think mines a private jet! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
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Yup, coz those who have private jets, tickets are exclusive and guests are limited but high quality.
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